After the tragic 2000 "election," I coped by joining every tree-hugging, peace-marching, polar bear-saving organization I could afford. In exchange for my 20 bucks I received bumper stickers and frightening e-newsletters, but none as disturbing as the Organic Consumers Association Organic Bytes. Here's a recent one, #176: Alert of the Week: Stop Monsanto's Genetically Engineered Wheat; Related Quote of the Week: The Hazards of Genetic Engineering, etc. I became afraid of food but I still managed to maintain my 22% body fat thanks to hunger-induced amnesia, eventually prompting me to mark the Organic Bytes harbinger of doom as spam right before heading to my favorite taco stand.
There's no way to sugar coat it. Food, Inc. is the feel-bad movie of the year; a terrifying and eerily prescient, non-fiction version of Soylent Green, the 1973 movie which depicted a dystopian future wherein overpopulation and the destruction of the environment have rendered human life cheap, but food--that is, real food--is very expensive. The government dispenses rations of synthetic food substances made by the Soylent Corporation: Soylent Yellow, Soylent Red, and the newest product, Soylent Green. It's all about the cheap food and so is Food, Inc.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Slumdog Millionaire, not really because I choose to, but because that damn song is being played over and over again everyfuckingwhere I go. (I actually got up and tried to do the Bollywood dance the other day.) Thanks to this reluctant reflection, I’ve decided I did not like the movie that much and if I continue thinking about it I may grow to hate it. Actually, I just may be one Danny Boyle or Dev Patel interview away from such contempt.
Slumdog suffers from is the same affliction that curses just about every American made movie: the closed narrative loop. What makes most Hollywood movies numbingly boring and irrelevant is the structure: premise, plot, sub-plots, a protagonist, one or more antagonists, climax, resolution, and the warm-happy sunset to ride off into. Contrivance is the necessary tool to fit reality into a neat two hour narrative package. Hollywood teaches us to deny reality and that’s why the USA is the most ignorant major industrial nation on earth.
This self-billed "feel good movie of the year" may help us "feel good" that we are among the lucky ones on earth, but it delivers a patronizing, colonial and ultimately sham statement on social justice for those who are not.
What might Slumdog look like in the hands of Satyajit Ray, Ken Loach or John Sayles?
There may be just one good thing to come out Slumdog’s popularity. I predict once it’s out on DVD it will dethrone Haggis’ Crash (the worst movie ever made) as the No. 1 rental on Netflix.
Mickey Rourke--actor Heath Ledger--supporting actor Kate Winslet--actress Penelope Cruz--supporting actress (Viola Davis might take it) WALL-E--animated feature, original screenplay Benjamin Snooze Button-art direction, make-up, visual effects Slumdog--picture, director, adapted screenplay, cinematography, score, film editing The Duchess--costume design Man on Wire--documentary feature The Witness--doc short Waltz with Bashir-foreign pic Jai-Ho from Slumdog The Pig--live action short Presto--Animated short
I finally got around to watching Slumdog Millionaire. I thought it would be embarrassing to go to my Oscar party and not have seen at least one of the nominated movies. And I wanted to see it on a big screen since the consensus was that it was a big screen movie. I’m not going to write a full analysis/review since I’m a bit backed up in my writing, but here are some observations.
First, I have to defend myself. My friend John Luke Retard called me a Scrooge after I told him what I thought of Slumdog. Someone who chokes up during the previews is not a Scrooge (yes, it’s true, I don’t mind admitting it). She’s a film lover who hopes the movie she’s about to see is great.
From the very first sequence, Boyle tells us that “this movie is going to be INTENSE. If, at some point, you find yourself thinking ‘I need a massage after this,’ don't loathe yourself for the juxtaposition of your upper-middle class problems with the abject poverty shown in the film. This movie is heartbreaking from beginning to (almost) end, and it will take you through every emotion.” I have to admit I felt guilty for cursing the Governator on Friday and for checking the blue book to see if my car was worth more than $15,000. Anyway...
Whereas in previous Boyle efforts the music and style serve the story, here they carry the movie. I didn't mind the corniness since the movie embraces it, but the performances and the writing have to be there to support the corn. (Despite my reputation, I love corn, as long as it’s good and the manipulation is flawless.)
My guess (as a screenwriter) is that the story was originally meant to focus on the brotherly relationship which was sufficiently developed and infinitely more interesting than the love story. Jamal was probably slated to save his brother, not a chick he really didn’t have chemistry with because he hardly saw her during the entire two hours. But of course, you have to have the love story to pull in the female audience. That’s fine, but develop it man!
The last third of the movie is filled with forced, and sometimes cringe inducing dialogue that we’ve heard before. I’m baffled that Boyle couldn’t think of a more original situation for Latika. A pretty girl forced to be the mistress of a gangster? Really, Danny? For instance, why not have her buried alive in a shallow grave while ravenous zombies try to dig her out?
I’ve seen all of Boyle’s movies and, as far as I can recall, he’s never blatantly pandered to the audience. I lost all respect for him after being subjected to the end montage of scenes from the movie to remind us the hell the characters went through and to nudge that last tear. With that, everything that was right with the movie went to hell.
Note to Danny: Now that you’ve got your Oscars, success and money, please make up with John Hodge and make a good movie again. And what the hell was that business with the bathtub and the money?
Slumdog reminded me why I don't usually watch Oscar-nominated movies, but is also the type of movie that makes me wish I was a regular filmgoer so I could enjoy it just like everyone else. If you expect to taste boloney when you bite into a boloney sandwich, then you won’t feel disappointed when you don’t taste fois gras.
I went to a self distribution talk tonight at Film Independent. It was an eye opener and I learned a lot. I still have a lot of research to do, but the most important thing I learned was that independent filmmakers must start marketing their films before they even shoot them. Toward that end, I will start a new blog called "LA, I Hate You," the title of my first feature. More about this later, but now, here's the link to Ted Hope's blog:
One of the biggest problems with this movie is that you’re supposed to be rooting for a retarded guy to win sole custody over a child, and I think that’s not really something that should be rooted for. No offense to any retarded parents out there, but raising children is extremely hard (I’m not doing it). Despite Sean Penn’s incessant and unbearable Oscar-baiting by revisiting a role he first created for Fast Times at Ridgemont High, I’m not convinced by this movie’s use of Sam’s charming origami hobby and lovably obsessive desire for IHOP pancakes that he’s capable of raising a child. Sometimes love isn’t all you need when love can’t read anything more complicated than a Dr. Seuss book and when love has the mental capacity of a seven-year-old. Oh, that was my favorite thing about the movie. The movie kept reminding us that Sam had the mind of a seven-year-old and that Dakota Fanning had just turned seven, with the ever-present question “what's going to happen when she turns eight?” Because that’s how brains work. Every year on your birthday you are given all the mental capacity you are going to need for the next year. Unless, as this movie teaches us, you're retarded. Which leads me to…
Havoc
What is it with Stephen Gaghan movies and the depiction of upper-middle class white teenagers’ casual experimentation with crack? I grew up in La Jolla, a bastion of upper-middle class-ness and the only time I saw crack was…I can’t remember. It was in the 80s when we still used real coke. Anyway, it was written by Gaghan who has one Oscar. It was directed by Barbara Kopple who has two Oscars. Anne Hathaway shows her tits in the movie. THREE TIMES. Should be good right? Wrong! This movie should be called The Unbearable Diaries because it’s an unbearable, embarrassing hour and a half of Anne Hathaway speaking “gangsta.” It’s so bad that you stop feeling bad for Anne and move on to feeling bad for her mom and dad, who had to try and think of something nice to say to her about this movie. To be fair though, the movie is doomed from the beginning because the first line of the whole thing is Anne saying “So you want to know about life in the Palisades?” And the answer to that is HELLA NO! But they never give us time to answer, yo.
These are just my current observations since I’ve only seen three (In Bruges, The Dark Knight, Vicky Cristina Barcelona) of the nominees. I will see Milk and Frozen River soon. I have no intention of watching Forest Gump Reloaded. For the rest, I will wait to get my free screening invites. I know I’m not supporting the local economy, but I only pay for foreign language movies.
Best motion picture of the year
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" As I said, Forest Gump Reloaded.
"Frost/Nixon" I think I’d rather see the actual interviews, which are out on DVD.
"Milk" Forget it. Brokeback Mountain already got it.
"The Reader" A holocaust movie would normally have a better than good chance but the top contenders are Benjamin and Slumdog. They’ll give it to Kate.
"Slumdog Millionaire" Danny Boyle has yet to make a bad movie, so, even if this one is not his best, it has the feel good factor on its side. It’d be an upset if it didn’t win. Plus, Mumbai, you know…terrorists and all. Yea, it’s gonna win.
Performance by an actor in a leading role
Richard Jenkins in “The Visitor”: Crap. I missed the free screening. I’ll push it up my Netflix queue.
Frank Langella in "Frost/Nixon"
Sean Penn in "Milk"
Brad Pitt in "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button": Only one thing comes to mind when I see or hear this name. Brad is fucking JC.
Mickey Rourke in "The Wrestler": I think this is pretty much a done deal unless Bono starts campaigning for Brad.
Performance by an actor in a supporting role
Josh Brolin in "Milk": I like Josh, but he’s a wife beater.
Robert Downey Jr. in "Tropic Thunder": This is the Academy’s idea of an African American nominee this year. They must have missed Forest Whitaker in Vantage Point. Denzel, where are you?
Heath Ledger in "The Dark Knight": I suspect they gave him the Globe so they wouldn’t have to waste the Oscar on a dead dude, but there isn’t much competition in this category. Slam dunk.
Michael Shannon in "Revolutionary Road”: I don’t even know who this dude is.
Philip Seymour Hoffman in "Doubt": As if he cares.
Performance by an actress in a leading role
Anne Hathaway in "Rachel Getting Married": Cue ball eye lids has no chance against Kate.
Angelina Jolie in "Changeling": Probably not, since the consensus was that the movie was not very good. Newsflash: I like her now that I found out Brad is screwing JC. Turns out Angie has a tattoo of a crucifix on her khunt-adjacent region. Now, that’s what I call a sense of humor.
Meryl Streep in "Doubt": Hey, what happened to Mamma Mia nomination?
Kate Winslet in "The Reader": Holocaust movie and British actor. I can’t think of a more winning combination. Can you?
Melissa Leo in "Frozen River"
Performance by an actress in a supporting role
This is where the big bucks will be made. I’m waiting to see what the Vegas odds are. But since there are no other African American nominees and The Messiah is now Prez….you do the math. Viola or Taraji.
Amy Adams in "Doubt" Penélope Cruz in "Vicky Cristina Barcelona" Viola Davis in "Doubt" Taraji P. Henson in "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
Marisa Tomei in "The Wrestler": You have to be kidding me. She should show up and return the Oscar she already got.
Best animated feature film of the year
"Bolt" Chris Williams and Byron Howard "Kung Fu Panda" John Stevenson and Mark Osborne
"WALL-E" Andrew Stanton: The geniuses of Pixar will definitely get it.
Achievement in cinematography
"Changeling" Tom Stern "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" Claudio Miranda "The Dark Knight" Wally Pfister "The Reader" Chris Menges and Roger Deakins
"Slumdog Millionaire" Anthony Dod Mantle: Tony, I call him Tony, shot Festen (The Celebration to you philistines), one of my top twenty (I love you Ulrich!) and many cool movies. I really, really, really hope he wins.
Achievement in directing
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" David Fincher: I have nothing against Fincher, just Brad and Forest Gump.
"Frost/Nixon" Ron Howard: I have lots against Opie. As a director, not as a person.
"Milk" Gus Van Sant: As long as his movies are financed, I don’t really care. He can direct Will Good Hunting Redux and I wouldn’t diss him
"The Reader" Stephen Daldry: Sorry. Tough competitors. There’s always next year.
"Slumdog Millionaire" Danny Boyle: Fincher is his only competition. And Boyle has directed more and better movies.
Best documentary feature
"The Betrayal (Nerakhoon)": A woman cinematographer’s first directorial debut. Love it.
"Encounters at the End of the World": I just want to see if Werner shows up to the ceremony. I have to admit I’d be very disappointed if he did.
"Man on Wire": This is the best suspense thriller of the year, bur frankly, I don’t know if I can sit through it. The subject unnerves me.
"The Garden"
"Trouble the Water"
Best foreign language film of the year
I haven’t seen them. I know I said I only pay for foreign movies, but what I meant by foreign was, French movies through the 1960s.
"The Baader Meinhof Complex" - Germany "The Class" - France "Departures" - Japan "Revanche" - Austria "Waltz with Bashir" - Israel
Adapted screenplay
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" Screenplay by Eric Roth: Eric shamelessly plagiarizes a movie he already won an Oscar for. F. Scott Fizgerald my ass. Roth is my screenwriting role model.
"Doubt" Written by John Patrick Shanley: It’s a play, not a movie. Blah, blah, blah…
"Frost/Nixon" Screenplay by Peter Morgan
"The Reader" Screenplay by David Hare
"Slumdog Millionaire" Screenplay by Simon Beaufoy: Start making room on your mantle Simon.
Original screenplay
"Frozen River" Written by Courtney Hunt
"Happy-Go-Lucky" Written by Mike Leigh: Mike deserves an Oscar for every film he has written and directed. Period.
"In Bruges" Written by Martin McDonagh: My kind of movie. Scabrously funny, gloriously irreverent and black as night. No chance in hell.
"Milk" Written by Dustin Lance Black
"WALL-E" Screenplay by Andrew Stanton, Jim Reardon
I will update as I see more movies. I have to admit I’m very disappointed in the Academy. Only three black nominees in this entire list, including Robert Downey Jr. Whatever happened to Change and Hope? Oprah is not going to be happy. No siree.
We’ve hit a minor snag in our production schedule due to our financing falling through. It seems the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Los Angeles has a $660 million bill to pay and won’t be able to fund our show. Luckily for us and you, PBS has agreed to step in and save the day. We’re very happy but don’t expect to see any pinko commie programming. No siree! We will not compromise our laissez faire ideals. However, due to the significant reduction in funding, we will have to cut down on our production costs. Hopefully this won’t have any effect on the production value of the show. We are committed to bringing you quality programming.
Having said that...
Sister Galina and I spent yesterday evening taping her video introduction so that you can get to know her a little better. You can check it out at:
http://operator11.com/people/3312
All you have to do is click on one the little boxes to the right of your screen and voila! You’ll get a little tidbit about Sister Galina and what makes her tick. Watch it, rate it and comment at your heart’s content.
We’ll keep you posted on our progress.
Teri Carson Executive Producer So LA! with Sister Galina
P.S. You can watch the trailer at the link above or here:
P.S.S. Now you have a really good reason to contribute to PBS! But wait for the membership drives so you can get a cool gift. I swear by my Dr. Perricone kit. My skin has never looked better. Or if you ruined your credit you might consider the Suze Orman package. Just a suggestion.
DizzydentFilms was created to develop and promote film which completely disregards formulaic standards and which exemplifies our philosophy of nonconformism and artistic anarchy.
About Me
Name: dizzydent
Location: Los Angeles, California, United States
Human flaws and moral ambiguity are interesting. I want to explore why perfectly intelligent people, who seem to have some sort of grasp on life, go around acting in a self-defeating way. Humans express their neuroses in many ways, and that is what makes people fascinating. I love those quirky, edgy, nonverbal, silent, tiny little moments, those powerful interchanges between people, things that almost always go unsaid, that people know are happening all the time but nobody has the courage to talk about. That's what I make movies about. The ideal film is neither prescriptive nor conclusive; it is ambivalent and it will move people when they are in the theater and make them think only after they leave. I want people to walk away with work to do, investigate, ask questions of themselves. I may like to talk about or be interested in a more philosophical or political agenda, but film is, ultimately, about narrative. It is about telling stories that are engaging and dramatic.
"If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced." --Vincent Van Gogh
